The Bolivian Tsunami

Edgar Allan Pope!

2010-12-14T07:15:00.000-08:00

Yep, We are back!

And we want to congratulate those students who have survived this horribly difficult year.

Well, here is our version of the holy father prayer, if it was written by Edgar Allan Poe. Enjoy it!

Our Father, Who has a raven,
Hallowed be Thy Name.
Thy Dreamland come.
And nothing more, on earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us the happiest day our daily bread.
And forgive us our Hymn,
as we forgive those who trespass against Lenore.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the conqueror worm. Amen, and nothing more.

Confessions

2008-05-20T11:37:00.000-07:00

today in the bolivian tsunami we'll give you a confessions special:

1.-THE POPE OWNED UP TO THE BOLIVIAN TSUNAMI. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2.-THE REAL HOPES OF CHAVEZ ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3.-LEONIDAS & JERJES... THE REAL STORY --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 4.-BUSH: THE REAL SUPER MAN ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 5.-EVO MORALES: "I WANT TO BE A SON OF THE BEACH" ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1.- THE POPE Joseph Ratzinger, alias The Nazi Pope, benedict XVI, gollum, or however you want to call him, the pope talked to The Bolivian Tsunami. That's what he said... [BT: The Bolivian Tsunami] [P: Pope]
BT: hello Mr Joseph... can we call you Joseph?
P: yes, you can, after all, it's not my real name
BT: Isn't it? so, could you tell us what's your real name?

P: i'll never tell you that my real name is Sméagol, it's a secret!
BT: So, are you confessing to be gollum?!
P: no, I'm just Nazi
BT: it's not a surprise, but our question was if you were Gollum
P: [so nervous] no, i'm not!!!! who told you this fucking lie??!!
BT: you told us that your name was Sméagol and that you were nazi too
P: no, holy bastard!!! all of you will be burning on hell!!!! oh! motherfuckers! if Hitler, my lord who is on heaven, or latin america, could see how assholes you are.... mhhh... can we start the interview again???
BT: ehhh... sure, let's start again
P: ok, i'm ready
BT: Hello Mr Benedict XVI
P: good morning to all God's children, including you
BT: oh, thank you. how does it feel to be the pope?
P: oh! it's nothing special, it's just being one of the two most powerful men on the earth.
BT: two most powerful men?? who is the other one?
P: George Bush
BT: and... which do you think is the biggesst difference between Bush and you?
P: people don't hate me... and... i also can fly!!!!!!!!
BT: can you?
P: Hell yeah!...
BT: so... can you walk over water too?
P: are you kidding me?! that's not an evil power of the horror empire that our holy fürer had began
BT: ok, so, what about this horror empire that you're talking about?
P: Shut up fuckin', and go away, i don't wanna talk to you anymore.... i'll kill you by myself, i knew chaiten's volcano couldn't do it!!!!
BT: so, is it the end of the interview?
P: i think so
BT: ok, so good bye mr. pope, see you next time!!! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- THE REAL HOPES OF CHAVEZ: Hugo Chavez, Venezuela's president, he's so famous because he's always saying peaceful messages to the humanity, we could say he's the second jesus, no, it's not true, he's just a fuckin' funny asshole who everytime he opens his mouth, says just crap.... whatever....
we talked to him and he told us about his real hopes
(or something like that). Chavez was born, grew up, and he's not dead yet. One day he met a man, Chavez thought that man was so handsome, and he tried to kiss him, but the man, who got really confused, hit him. After some time, Chavez discovered that this man was called George Bush, and he got really mad. Suddenly, Chavez killed the other candidates to the presidency.... and we all know what happened then. Now Chavez is trying to be the messiah, he thinks he'll give the sea to bolivia and stop every single war in the world..... Ok, we're just kidding, he just wants to fuck all presidents on the world.
(those were his real hopes).

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3.- JERJES AND LEONIDAS
Leonidas and Jerjes, them both, a whale!!!!!!
Leonidas and Jerjes are really good friends, they like going to the cinema, going to the park, eating ice creams together and somethings they didn't want to tell us.... whatever.

We asked them the big doubt everybody have in mind, we asked them about if they were lovers, but they have the same doubt, so, we wasted our time... but we snooped them after the interview.... and we discovered somethings.
1.- they live together
2.- Jerjes doesn`t use underwear
3.- Leonidas is getting fat
4.- Jerjes has never taken a shower (without Leonidas)
5.- they aren't gay, Leonidas is a hairy woman -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
4.- BUSH: THE REAL SUPERMAN

George Bush, the president of the USA, though he is one of the most powerful men on the world, he also has some other aspects that many people have not idea.

He has supermuscles, to support all a country and win every war, He's a super macho too xD

he can seduce a turkey and no one will gossip about a fuckin' animal affair

his umbrella can be upside down and nobody could laugh at him

he can be that sad (sniff!) that could make us cry...

he can destroy countries
if they don't want to reduce
the price of the oil to USA

he can even see long distances if his small telescope's viewfinders are filled!!!!!!

and he's like the loveliest honey bunny

he's our bush... the real super man
nobody can stop him
nobody can fuck his empire, not even us.

that's our bush

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Have you ever seen such a horrible happy face as this?... We have!

But not gonna tell you nothing about Rocio Marengo without make up!

first edition

2008-05-15T12:27:00.000-07:00

1.-CHAITEN'S PRETTY GRAY!!!!

we interviewed the volcano ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2.-MOTHER'S DAY

happy day mommy ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3.-SHOCKING DISCOVERY!!! a scientist team found a city under smog. historians, physicists, mathematicians, archeologists, researchers and chimbarongo's psychic inferred it could be 'SANTIAGO', the lost chilean capital. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 4.-CHINA'S EARTHQUAKE SHAKED THE WORLD

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 5.-HORRIBLE!!!!!

teenager "mother" murdered her newborn daughter. the murder weapon were scissors ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1.-CHAITEN'S PRETTY GRAY

Chaiten's volcano talked to THE BOLIVIAN TSUNAMI and that was what it told us

:[V=Volcano][B=Bolivian Tsunami]

B:why are you threatening with an impending eruption?

V: it's not something what i wanted to.... i just had a terrible stomachache

B:so, you didn't mean to scare people?

V:no, no, i like them, it wasn't my intention, now everyone thinks i'm an ogre

B:all we know you aren't an ogre, but you are a volcano, some people think you are worse than an ogre

V:it isn't true, why do you think chaiten's people didn't want to leave this town?

B:because they didn't want to leave their homes, their jobs, their animals, or pets, etc

V:you're wrong, it was because of me, they love me, every day i get lots and lots of mails from the people!!!

B:so.... have you ever read any letter?

V:are you crazy???!!! i'm a volcano, i can't read!!!! but i know people love me

B:could you tell me, if you're a volcano and because of that you can't read, how are you able to answer our interview?

V:go away muthafuckin'!!!!!!!! i'll burn you!!! i'll kill you!!!! do you want to take a shower with my lava, man????!!!!

B:no

V:so go fuckin' away stupid assholes!!!!!

then the volcano started erupting.
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2.-MOTHER'S DAY

Specially Greetings to my mum, who gave me some money to buy her a gift. THANK YOU MOMMY!!!!!Thousands of chilean people have spent lots of money on this weekend to celebrate MOTHER'S DAY; Chocolates, Flowers, Candies, vibrant false penises, baby dolls and cigarretes were the main presents.

We have interviewed lots of mothers, but we didn't want to publish it. HAPPY DAY TO ALL MOTHERS!!!----------------------------------------------------

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3.-SHOCKING DISCOVERY

A scientists team infer that under smog there could be Santiago, the chilean capital that got lost so many years ago.chimbarongo's psychic told us that it could be true, but we don't believe her 'cause she never found Maddie, nor anyone, like she pretended to.anyway.... scientists are still investigating that.----------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

4.-CHINESE EARTHQUAKE the number of casualties and deadshaven't still been known. time is gold for finding the most survivors as it is possible

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5.-HORRIBLE!!!!!teenager "mother" murdered her newborn daughter the murder weapon were scissors.WE'D GIVE HER CAPITAL PUNISHMENT

fuckin' bitch!!!! she told that the reason for the crime was that she didn't like to have a baby....the fuckin' capital punishment we'd give her could be the lava shower that chaiten's volcano offered us.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thanks for wasting your time reading this shit

special greetings to isabel and her website

http://www.thefreakytimes.blogspot.com